|
|
|
Chemistry song 12 |
I Saw Teacher Kissing Santa Chlorine
I saw teacher kissing Santa Chlorine
under the chemistree last night
They didn't sneak me down the periodic chart
to take a peek
At all the atoms reacting in their beakers;
it was neat.
And I saw teacher kissing Santa Chlorine
under the chemistree so bright
Oh what a reaction there would have been
if the principal had walked in
With teacher kissing Santa Chlorine last night.
|
Email this joke to your friends | Send Free SMS To Any Mobile In INDIA or broad
|
|
|
|
Chemistry is boring |
IT'S OFFICIAL : CHEMISTRY LECTURES ARE A YAWN.
October 9, 1995
A scientist has come up with proof of something students have known for years -- chemistry lectures are boring. In an article published in the current issue of Chemistry in Britain, a university chemistry lecturer introduced a guest lecturer to a class of 50 doctoral candidates.
Then, he and his colleagues studied variations in what he calls the HTFDR -- "head-to-floor distance reduction." After about an hour , the average HTFDR dropped from 135cm to 121cm, said the author of the study, who preferred to remain anonymous.
The HTFDR immediately bounced back to normal when the speaker uttered the magic words: "And in conclusion . . ."
|
Email this joke to your friends | Send Free SMS To Any Mobile In INDIA or broad
|
|
|
|
Biologist experiment |
There was this biologist who was doing some experiments with frogs. He was measuring just how far frogs could jump. So he puts a frog on a line and says "Jump frog, jump!". The frog jumps 2 feet. He writes in his lab book: 'Frog with 4 legs - jumps 2 feet'.
Next he chops off one of the legs and repeats the experiment. "Jump frog jump!" he says. The frog manages to jump 1.5 feet. So he writes in his lab book: 'Frog with 3 legs - jumps 1.5 feet'.
He chops off another and the frog only jumps 1 foot. He writes in his book: 'Frog with 2 legs jumps 1 foot'.
He continues and removes yet another leg. " Jump frog jump!" and the frog somehow jumps a half of a foot. So he writes in his lab book again: 'Frog with one leg - jumps 0.5 feet'.
Finally he chops off the last leg. He puts the frog on the line and teels it to jump. "Jump frog, jump!". The frog doesn't move. "Jump frog, jump!!!". Again the frog stays on the line. "Come on frog, jump!". But to no avail.
The biologist finally writes in his book: 'Frog with no legs - goes deaf'
|
Email this joke to your friends | Send Free SMS To Any Mobile In INDIA or broad
|
|
|
|
What do you call a tooth in a glass of water? |
Q. What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?
A. One molar solution. |
Email this joke to your friends | Send Free SMS To Any Mobile In INDIA or broad
|
|
|
|
Chemistry song 08 |
Test Tubes Bubbling
(to the tune of "Chestnuts Roasting On An Open Fire")
Test tubes bubbling in a water bath
Strong smells nipping at ypur nose.
Tiny molecules with their atoms all aglow
Will find it hard to be inert tonight.
They know that Chlorine's on its way
He's loaded lots of little electrons on his sleigh
And every student's slide rule is on the sly
To see if the teacher really can multiply.
And so I offer you this simple phrase
To chemistry students in this room
Although it's been said many times, many ways
Merry molecules to you.
|
Email this joke to your friends | Send Free SMS To Any Mobile In INDIA or broad
|
|
|
|
Sodium fell in love with a Bunsen burner... |
A small piece of sodium which lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner.
"Oh Bunsen, my flame. I melt whenever I see you . . .", the sodium pined.
"It's just a phase you're going through", replied the Bunsen burner. |
Email this joke to your friends | Send Free SMS To Any Mobile In INDIA or broad
|
|
|
|
If a bear in Yosemite, and one in Alaska fall ... |
Q. If a bear in Yosemite, and one in Alaska fall into water, which one would dissolve faster?
A. The bear in Alaska because it's polar. |
Email this joke to your friends | Send Free SMS To Any Mobile In INDIA or broad
|
|
|
|
Blondes to the moon |
At a press conference the Brunettes announce they are going to make a trip to the Moon. The Redheads speak up "That's been done before, we're going to go to Mars". The Blondes speak up "That's nothing, we're going to be the first people to go to the Sun". One of the reporters says "Don't you idiots know that you'll burn up?" The Blondes say "NO WE WON'T; WE'RE GOING TO GO AT NIGHT!"
|
Email this joke to your friends | Send Free SMS To Any Mobile In INDIA or broad
|
|
|
|
What is the chemical formula for water? |
Little Johnny's teacher asks, "What is the chemical formula for water?"
Little Johnny replies, "HIJKLMNO"!!
The teacher, puzzled, asks, "What on Earth are you talking about?"
Little Johnny replies, "Yesterday you said it was H to O!" |
Email this joke to your friends | Send Free SMS To Any Mobile In INDIA or broad
|
|
|
|
Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak? |
Q: Why does hamburger have lower energy than steak?
A: Because it's in the ground state. |
Email this joke to your friends | Send Free SMS To Any Mobile In INDIA or broad
|
|
|