Two men trying hard not to get draftedTwo buddies are on their way to the U.S. Army Induction center for physicals. Neither wants to go to war, so one says, "I hear that if you don't have any teeth they won't take you." They decide it's worth a try, so they stop at a Dentist and have all their teeth pulled.
When they arrive at the Induction Center there is a line waiting to get physicals. They decide it might look fishy if both stand in line, one after the other, so one guy heads for the back of the line. Just as he steps into line, a big 'ol farm boy hits the end of the line right in front of him, so the 2nd toothless guy lines up behind him.
The first toothless guy steps up and the doc asks, "Anything wrong with you?"
The Guy says, "Well, no, except I don't have any teeth."
The Doc says, "Open up and let me have a look." The Guy opens his mouth and the doctor runs his finger around his gums and says, "Sure enough, you stand over there." The line slowly progressed to his buddy while he waited. The Farm boy steps up and the doc asks, "Anything wrong with you?"
The Farm Boy says, "No doc, 'ceptin I have a little case of the piles."
The doctor says, "Bend over, spread 'em and let me see."
The Boy does so.
The doctor rams his finger in, pulls it out, looks at his finger and says, "Sure enough. You've got 'em, stand over there."
The next toothless guy steps up and when the doctor asks him, "Anything wrong with you?"
He bellows, "NOT GODDAMN THING, JUST GIVE ME THE GUN!!!" |